Updated: Sep 24, 2020
I had someone send me a message yesterday and I couldn't believe the part where it said: "just thank god you didn't have like "REAL" Cancer............. (My Mind Blown). Now I feel the need to share this because this isn't the first time someone has said something like this. I've heard things like this before (WHILE PREGNANT/Going through treatment), and trust me I already know some people just don't know what to say or maybe how to act about my situation because I did/do handle it very positively and maybe that made them think less of the situation, but what in the heck is "REAL" Cancer? I could not help but take offense to that and though I hate to even put an explanation out to such a naive statement, I have experienced this a lot and maybe sharing it will open the eyes to some who have thought similar thoughts so they may never comment like this to someone who has fought harder then you could ever imagine. I'm certain that many people who have fought the fight with cancer would also take offense to such comments.
Is my cancer not real/serious because it had a high curable rate, it was caught early enough, and that I survived? Because you didn't see me on my sickest days, only the days I choose to share and most of that was POSITIVITY because that's what gets you through something like cancer. Aren't they discounting everything I've been through by telling me it wasn't "REAL"? Such a naive statement. Not to mention makes no sense.
They don't even know the fear we've experienced for my life and the life of my then, unborn child. Does that not make it real? That thank god my cancer was found early enough before it spread into my bone marrow/other organs making it more serious, would it then seem more "REAL" to them then? No matter what stage, level, or severity someone has, it is STILL Cancer! It can Kill no matter how curable it is and that puts a fear in you I wish so badly no one had to ever feel. Not to mention the possibilities of things that could be affected in your body down the road after all the Chemotherapy, like the chance of infertility to name one. That is real.
No one besides my husband has seen me suffer in the pain that cancer causes. Let me just say, I may do my updates/blogs online to help keep my own spirits up along with helping others in the least bit of ways I can, but that is my ONLY motivation in doing those things, I don't look for pity or an applause, but with the only hopes, like I said since day one, that my situation could help someone else or maybe help inspire them in maybe some of their darkest days. It makes me feel better to share my struggles with this journey and my accomplishments with it because it gives others, not to mention myself, the prime example of how precious life really is and for the simple fact that I'm still here to share it all. That my son is thriving and healthy as could be.
So to those who have thrown around words without any concept to what I've been through or anyone in similar situations for that matter, try and think before you speak. Cancer is cancer, no matter how treatable or how untreatable it is. It changes you forever. It can be a killer and it has to many and for those who have survived, we will always live with a slight bit of fear that it could return. It will forever change your body, scars and all. Just because someone can handle something and keep a positive attitude, that should not discount someone's battle and someone else thinking/saying it wasn't that bad or that it wasn't "REAL". I remind myself these comments come from people who have never been through a situation like mine and I pray they never have to. #ThinkBeforeYouSpeak #Survivor